PSA from a Nog

A Scene of Great Genius: The Man and the Soda Fountain

Imagine this:
A little boy, 6-ish, walks into a deli with his mother. His mother orders sandwiches for them and also orders two medium drinks: a combo that saves them $2.58. As the mother goes to pick a table, she hands both cups to her son, so that he may go and get their drinks. The little lad approaches the soda machine, where an elderly man with a long beard is standing with a cane. The little boy, wanting to be polite, smiles at the man, and then proceeds to get his and his mother’s drinks—a Sprite and Lipton Raspberry Iced Tea, respectively. As the little boy reaches up to get more ice for his mother’s tea, the old man picks up the boy by the back of the neck and slams him into the soda machine, showering the boy with diet cola. As the little boy screams, the old man slides him back and forth, back and forth, the boy’s face deploying each and every soda and soaking him with a shower of fizzing liquid. Onlookers, appalled at the old man’s cruelty, rush up to help the struggling, soggy boy. The old man tosses the boy behind him and picks up some of the onlookers, repeating his crazed attack. The police come and arrest the man, and Keith, the deli’s custodian, is stuck cleaning up the sticky beverages and ice splashed in a rainbow on the floor.

LOVE,

BRENT